The IPO; When Bane-Of-My-Existence Capital Came To Town

The IPO of Free Cheezeburgerz went well, thanks for asking.

There was one share for sale and, as expected, the the one share sold for $0.01. But the next day the angel investor exited, causing the stock price to plummet. The net worth of the corporation is now best defined as starving. The mission statement now reads, “Find a free cheeseburger.”

At first, private equity was nice by helping fund the last Free Cheeseburger created in the kitchen. But then Bane-of-My-Existence Capital maneuvered a hostile takeover of the Free Cheeseburger, subsequently firing the all of the employee (not plural) of the firm and refusing to pay the promised pension of one Free Cheeseburger.

That’s what happened when Bane came to town.

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